I can hide behind my Spawn! I can hold her right in front of me! That way I can let it allllll hang out. Also, since nobody talks to me about anything else anyway, I don’t have to worry about coming up with something witty to say. What a relief?
Of course, it’s the baby’s fault that I have anything to hide in the first place. Sigh…
My babysitter for tomorrow night has canceled. This is devestating. Obvisouly, paid help was my last option so now I’m s.o.l. Note to pregnant ladies: all those people who say they can’t wait to babysit your unborn child are full of crap. You will sit home alone. Now, if you’ll excuse me I’m just going to go lock myself in my closet and write in my diary about how stupid everyone is.
Click on the link to read the article about ‘baby brain’. It’s ligit! And that explains why I’ve forgotten to strap my baby in and simply placed her seat in the car, forgot to pay bills, forgot to put the cap back on after I actually remembered to put oil in the car, forgot to call people back, started the dishes and forgot to finish them, burned all or some of our dinner, lost the car keys right after I’ve unlocked the car, etc. I was actually starting to get a little depressed at how stupid and forgetful I’ve become but I am feeling better since I know it’s not my fault.
I’ll just add my brain to the list of parts of me that my baby has ruined.
It’s amazing how generous people are when you have your first child. The gifts are still rolling in. My silent partner and I only just started buying diapers. What a gift. One person, in particular, has been very generous. We’ve affectionately named him the Benefactor. It was Father Christmas but I thought that might eventually start to confuse the baby. Or ruin Christmas. Anyway, the Benefactor bought some cute clothes for the baby and included in the lot were two t-shirts that say “Big Sister”. Umm… hold the phone. My baby is only just beginning to crawl (much to my chagrin) and now I’m supposed to consider another? The Benefactor, being very benefactory, was sending more of a friendly reminder I think because the t-shirts were post dated for 24 months.
I guess two only makes sense. One can wash and one can dry.