March 2009
14 posts
A friend has recently told me that she is pregnant. The news almost made me cry. In a good way. And then in a bad way. Nobody is more excited to hear that a friend is pregnant than those who already have kids. But it gets complicated. There are stages of acceptance when a new mom hears that a friend is expecting.
1. happiness: for them. They’re happy, you’re happy.
2. happiness: for...
Women in N.S will NOT be cowering in bathroom... →
Like I have done. I know you’re supposed to love your breasts as they finally live up to their purpose and proudly and publically breast feed because it is natural and beautiful but I can’t. I have left the restaurant to nurse in the car, I’ve sat in a bathroom stall, gone to other rooms, etc. Babies are too unpredictable and easily distracted to be relied upon to keep you...
lonesome dove
My associate walked all the way home from work before he realized that he had driven to work that morning. The car will sit in the parking lot until we pick it up tomorrow. That is why you see lone cars in parking lots, late at night. Somone has simply forgotten it.
Baby Bonus!
#1 I can talk to myself in public by pretending to be talking to the baby who doesn’t know/ care that I’m bitching about poor customer service or about how I’d like to decorate the living room.
sad
It’s sad when anyone suffers a fatal accident. Natasha Richardson’s ski accident is no exception. Her death has prompted some to debate the merits of legislating the use of helmets on the hill. Great idea. If it’s the law, many more people would definitely wear them. I know my chances of avoiding brain injury on the hill would drastically improve as I would never ski again. Snow...
Michael Jackson is a pervert. Remember? →
WTF??!! Am I, and a handful of young boys, the only one who remembers that MJ is a sick fuck?? I can’t listen to his music without thinking of his sleepovers. He has a theme park in his back yard!! Now, from the sale of alllllll these tickets, he’ll be able to afford a wave pool in his bedroom or an ice cream truck that he’ll drive around to elementary schools! Way to go people.
It's a man's world
I feel sorry for men. They don’t get to use wallets like women do. And so their change is all loosey-goosey in their pockets. And so they don’t get to carry around month’s worth of receipts for no reason or coupons they’ll never use because it’s tucked away in some pocket of their wallet. Also because they can’t deal with their emotions.
